Saturday, 10 December 2011

beautiful ppl

Today.........its going to be a long, wordy post (again). This time its (possibly) going to be even longer than all my previous posts. I used to think blogging with a lot of words is actually kinda pointless because, hey, who's going to be so free to read that chunk of who-knows-what-you're-trying-to-say-crap-its-all-complaints-anyway right? Then I realise that I'm blogging for myself. To release all the pent-up frustration/stress/angst/whatever. If I even have readers, I thank each and every single one because I know y'all are my beloved friends! 

Firstly, friends. I'm so afraid of letting anyone in already. By that I don't mean another random dude that's going to capture my heart and break it in the end again, but just anyone that even wants to be my friend. All the people you love, will let you down. And vice versa, you will also be a letdown to the people you love in one way or another. I don't want to let down the people I love, neither do I want to be let down. So many things have been happening these days, I wonder when its ever going to end. I treasure each and every person I'm friends with, aquaintance or best bud. I cry a lot whenever I lose someone in my life. I don't know why I'm such a softie. I may be guilty of saying harsh things - so harsh they may ruin everything I ever have with that someone I was harsh to. But everytime after I say all that mean crap, I feel guilty and bad even if I wasn't so much in the wrong. No, I am not saying that I don't have faults at all, I do. 
Anyway, I just want to say that I am very thankful for the people who have stuck around since I knew you. Really. I appreciate each and every one of you a truckload I don't know what I did to deserve y'all. Thank you thank you thank you!!!!!!!!